A good portion of the time I think in facebook statuses. Here are a few examples of things that didn't make the cut:

Molly Rosenberger is "only gonna break, break your, break, break your heart".

Molly Rosenberger is going to reintroduce flexibility stretches into my daily schedule...Now...Who wants to lay on top of me?

Molly Rosenberger sometimes stands pigeon-toed because I like the effect it has on my outfit.

They're not the best, but hey, I don't have a twitter, so these thoughts build over time. Aaaaaaaaaaaand releaaaaaaaaase...

Grey's Anatomy PLUS a whole hour of Sara Ramirez singing? SO many feelings.

But, you know what? Alan Shemper always puts me in a better mood.

If I could put my emotions to a sound RIGHT THIS SECOND they would comparable to a sighing string section...composed but all over the place at the same time. Humph.

Sometimes I think to myself...

You know, Kings of Leon, I really could use somebody.

Let's not misconstrue this though. I mean "use" in the way of hit it and quit it. Hot T'molly's got selfish needs of her own.

Yesterday, I went into work SO pissed off I was about to walk out. I'm super high drama, like hella, ya know? What a difference 9 hours makes because by 12 am when the last towel had been tri-folded and all the candles had been turned into the face-out position I was as happy as a kumquat in early autumn(from my research on google it is suggested that "early autumn" is when the kumquat fruit ripens). There was only one reason for this spectacular emotional 180, and his name is Ginuwine. Don't tell me music isn't a powerful tool because the closing playlist shifted my mood considerably. Ok, ok, it might have also had to do with an accompanying dance party that took place with Sarah...but...WHATEVER.

So, this is happening. I'll buy that the the idea for this movie came before No Strings Attached. I'll only buy it because No Strings Attached was supposed to be called Friends with Benefits, and I'm guessing there was a meeting that went a little something like this:

Movie Exec #1: Well, now what do we call it?

Movie Exec #2: Justin Timberlake is starring in this other one? Huh...We shall call it No Strings Attached, the name of NSYNC's sophomore album.

NSYNC will haunt you forever, Justin. Not even a second row seat at the Oscar's can save you from inevitable association.

I know a lot about a-mindless-lot.

This something wonderful popped up on my newsfeed this evening...You're gonna watch the whole thing, but I wouldn't mind if you forwarded to 1:52 where, I can't help myself, "the power of Christ compels" an incredible dance break.

My heart is leaping. I haven't checked up on these guys in a while, but it's like, I came back around, and they've left me the best gift ever...AND, AH DOWNLOADED. Can't even. "Rich Girl"???! SORRY, CAN'T RIGHT NOW.

Mhmmm...you try and figure this lingo out.

The "WHOA" said by the guy recording really seals the deal.

I'm gonna throw a couple songs your way courtesy of Ray 'Relevant' Lamontagne. The first one is a no-brainer. While I'm doing a bang up job at remaining positive these days, I also thought to myself on the crowded train this morning, "I wish people would try not to touch me as much as I try not to touch them."



The second one I just really like and have yet to grow tired of...and is the wrong answer to my problems. Still holds relevancy. Observation: The first is a little George Strait and the second is a little James Taylor. Ray Lamontagne is all-around money. Bling-blao!

What's happening? It's come to the point where I'm literally writing out how much I can spend on food, toiletries, and transportation per week. What if I need tampons, but I already bought volumizing shampoo the same week? Guess, I'll have to ride it out...No budging, Molls. YOU'RE HELLA POOR. Away, away, I've also been listening to "Uncharted" by Sara Bareilles way too much , but let me ask you this...have you ever had the privilege of feeling like sunshine is shooting from your belly? Like a care bear? Well, Sara makes me feel like an empowered care bear, and it certainly bares (bear, bare...I like where I'm going with this) great results. Today I got compliments such as:

-"You look tan!"

-"You're a manager here right? No? Well, you should be a manager."

-"Molly's in love!" (I, most assuredly, am not.)

Incredible results. But still, they are the direct product of listening to a Sara Bareilles song...gives me the wiggles. It reminds me I'm not too far off from the average twenty-something female living in New York City who wears Uggs and carries a Longchamp bag on the subway. Well, this has simply turned into a rant on Sara Bareilles, who, I'll go on the record as saying has a beautiful voice, so I'm going to keep it real, keep it categorized, and keep this short.

Hold on, now you have to listen to this song. After you watch this you'll understand me when I say...Whoah, Josh Groban, watch it with the banana prop.

"I love humor!"

It's like looking at myself in a mirror.

If Jason Schwartzman is promoting the news, I'm gonna read that news.

Alicia Keys- Try Sleeping with a Broken Heart

I'ma slow it down right now for y'all...

The National- Slow Show

Speaking of The National, I've had this song stuck in my head ALL DAY.

The National - Music - More Music Videos

:( But...It was always you John Slattery.

ABC INTERVIEW WITH CHARLIE SHEEN

"I have one speed. I have one gear. GO!"

If you haven't seen this yet...YOU SHOULD. It's crazy liquid magic.

What? WHAT?! Louboutins that look like pointe shoes?! Dweams come to life! I guess you can buy them here for $164. That must be a lie. They must be Fauxboutins (cutest new term I just coined)...or maybe they are real, and it's my birthday on Monday, and I want them, and I would have no idea what to do with them in this city, and I'd probably just end up keeping them in a box in my closet and only take them out on special occasions to lick the red bottoms. Yea, I'm not sure where my strong urge to lick the bottoms of Louboutins came from, but the urge is curiously strong. PS: Have you ever heard the song "Louboutins" by JLo? I hadn't either until this fateful summer when I realized our very own Johnny Napolitano was very well versed in Jennifer Lopez.

In other news: I just finished the first draft of my second book, now entitled “You’re Not Doing It Right.” It had another title but I discarded it because I always had to say it twice. I would say it, and people would be like, “What?” and then I would say it again and they would go, “Oh,” in a way that suggested they did not care for the title of my book. Like if you name your kid, “Argyle” or something.

- Michael Ian Black

He's finally back writing on his blog. It's definitely worth a read if you fall within the human spectrum.

There was a lady talking to someone on her phone outside of my building last week. She was all like, "Yea! I'm with the guy I met on match.com. I'm totally fine. I'm peeing my pants, he's making me laugh so hard." While I think that's terrible first blind date etiquette, I also imagine I'd be doing the exact same thing if I went on a date with Michael Ian Black. I'm not saying she was on a date with him. He has a wife, but I guess that's not stopping anyone these days. Wait, what was I saying? Right, Michael Ian Black is really funny.

What's amazing is when you can feel your life going somewhere. Like, your life just figured out how to get good. Like, that second.

- My So Called Life

This is what the weekend felt like...Now, let it remain.

How there was only one season of this show, I'll never know. Okay, poor ratings, but like, Claire Danes is a saint. And who wouldn't want to see more Jared Leto on their television? Especially pre 30 Seconds to Mars, sans weird rock star hair, baby faced Jared Leto?

This weekend was, dare I say, the best weekend I've had in the city in...ever. Let me count the ways:

- I got to perform three times with a cast of hilarious and talented actors for decent sized audiences. Though none of my friends came to see me (come on, I had to say it once), I had too many awesoem people on stage with me to care for reals.

- Jon "Nugget" Sangster and I made our NYC debut together. We could see Broadway from the window, so it counts as a special monumental moment in our friendship. We've come a long way from gymanstics performances in Pull-Ups.

- I drank a good portion of free wine.

- I drank a free shot (courtesty of Kat) too. I'd tell you what I had to do to get the shot, but I think a little mystery is more intriguing. Plus, if yous real innerested you can always get at me on my cellular device.

- I got to share two cab rides home with Claire who lives but three blocks from me. Pleasant result: severely reduced cab fares.

- Upon coming home at 4am one morning, I was greeted by a package of NEW SHOES! I woke up at noon with said shoes on my feet. There's not much better of a way to start a new day.

- I lost my script, my debit card, and I got caught in the rain. Thirty minutes later I found my script. Four hours later I found the debit card. It was still raining.

- Chips and salsa were involved somewhere in here.

- This weekend solidified a lady friendship between a blonde, brunette, and a redhead...Watch out for us...coming soon to a city location nearest YOU.

- I DANCED ON A TABLE TO BONE THUGS-N-HARMONY.

Can't touch this. Thank you to everyone who made this weekend possible. For you, I am truly grateful.

"I'M A VERY SEXY BABY."

Ladies and gentleman, there are few things funnier than a sexy baby joke. FEW.

EELS- All the Beautiful Things

Well, this is one of the most nauseatingly sweet songs I've ever heard.

Being a Dickhead's Cool

I got this from my friend Ryann whom, by the by, is a wonderful human. Enjoy this catchy tune, courtesy of all our dickhead peers.

VideoVom

Videos keep building up in my favorites column, and I have to start the purge:

1.


"JEEEWWWWWWWWWWWS." Pete Holmes, you's hysteeeerical.

2.

Wildfox Couture - Vive La France from ny lon on Vimeo.

WILDFOX SPRING 2011...funs.

3.


"End of the Road" from The Mickey Mouse Club. This is an obvious choice. I love how appreciated glasses were in the 90s. They should still be cherished nowadays. Glasses are really hot in an "I just rolled out of bed" kinda way (coming from the girl who never wore glasses, therefore having a jaded perception on this matter). Also, I love how serious the third kid is...and how he bares a striking resemblance to my first grade teacher, Ms. Edwards.

4.


"Motown Philly" from The Mickey Mouse Club. I must have been super specific in my youtube search this particular night: Boyz II Men, MMC, drunkgirl. I can promise you some baby Timberlake and Gosling in this video though. PLUS, A GLIMPSE OF CAN'T MISS, PREMATURE PUBERTY FROM 0:46-0:52.

5.


Erica Sobol performing her own choreography. Check out more of her work on her youtube channel.


6.


DRUNK BABY.

"Let's sing a French song to a French woman." Around the 5:20 mark you will hear "Awake My Soul" partially in French...I'm wholely enraptured.

I have a million things to say about this, but I can't figure out where to start. Am I trying to describe "speechless"?

AW YEA, I got the day off from work. This means I'll be having a glorified club day...Club days simply include partying all day like you "juh, juh, juh, juh, juuuuuuuuuuust got paid." I make perfect sense to myself.

My So Called Life is officially on instant netflix...great news.

Last night I watched the 1981 version of Arthur starring Dudley Moore. I became curious about it after having seen a poster for the new remake on my way home from work. After the calamity that was Russel Brand on Saturday Night Live, I'm shying away from seeing him in...anything. I'm not sure why it's being redone. The original is close to perfect. Dudley Moore is a genius. Liza Minelli is a star. In the new trailer they didn't even make any mention of Minelli's character. They do, however, show tons and tons of Jennifer Garner, whose character in the original is very minimal. Furthermore, the new movie won't have a theme song written by Christopher Cross, and isn't that the ultimate downgrade?